Talk

I have to laugh sometimes. I've been told I know a lot of people and a lot of things about people. I really don't, I just listen and watch and engage in conversation.  I talk.....to a lot of people......at random times. I laugh because I used to be quiet and reserved.

When I met my husband all those years ago, he was a talker. I remember early in our relationship we were at the mall. You know he was trying to impress me because he really hates going to the mall....unless he's going to get something. Haha. Anyway, we were walking through the food court and he just started talking to an older gentlemen for about 20 minutes. What they discussed I don't remember,  but when we walked away I asked him who that man was. He said..."I don't know, I just met him". This was foreign to me. To go up to a total stranger and engage in that type of conversation seeming as you've known the person for years......?? What? How is this possible?

Back in the day,  I was a bit on the shy side. I liked going places with my husband because I could just stand there and not have to say anything to most people. He would do all the talking for us both. It kept me in my comfort zone. It kept me safe. It kept me from having to reach out and make myself uncomfortable. This was a nice part of being married......especially to an extrovert. Maybe I'm exaggerating all this and how I was. Maybe I wasn't as shy as I seem to think I was? I don't know,  but my husband was my cover. That I do know.

As the years went by, I was put in situations where I had to talk to people. His health isn't the best so some things I had to tackle by myself. One year (maybe in 2001) my husband signed us both up to teach VBS at church. I had no clue what I was doing or why he raised his hand to volunteer. I was upset and scared......but then I figured I'd do what I always did. Stand behind him as he talked and be a helper in the class. That's it, I won't have to do any hard work, but help. All the teaching and talking will be on him, at least that's how it played out in my mind. Then 3 nights into a 5 night week, he got sick. Some  virus would keep him home. I was a mess. How was I going to do this teaching and talking thing by myself? Oh golly. He encouraged me that night telling me he would pray and I'd be fine. That I did know how and God would help me. This left me with no choice but to do it. I couldn't let the kids down and not show up.....I couldn't let the other teachers down and put more on them, I had to face my fears and go for it.

That night was awesome! I went there and my church family prayed for me before it began. They knew I was brand new at this and helped encourage me with the class. I believe that all those years ago, God allowed my husband to be sick to show me what He needed me to do. He needed me to step out of my comfort zone for His glory. He proved that in two hours that night. This evening was the first step in many, many other stories of how God uses broken people (like myself) to do His work. That night might have been a turning point in my life as far as people go.

As we grow in God our desires change. Now, I can talk to just about anyone and listen and not be afraid. In fact, I chat more now with people than my husband does. He tells me about it too......which is so funny cause I turned into him that way. He taught me well I guess. Haha. It's funny how we grow and change even after we are grown ups. It's amazing to me how God can still use us and chooses to use us despite our shortcomings. We just have to be willing and have the desire to do so. People are amazing and getting to know them is such a pleasure for me. I know I don't sound "normal", but I don't care. God is good and that's all that matters. ☺️